Published on December 11th, 2016 | by Tae0
Spoiling Your Children
As you may have noticed, what with me dedicating an entire site towards kids toys, I love toys and I love playing with my children, so when I see cool toys I think they’d love, it’s hard not to buy them sometimes! Spoiling my children is actually an issue I really struggled with for some time. Even before my first was born, a huge chunk of my money would go on the growing child inside me. Stuff he, of course, didn’t want or need. When he was born, things didn’t get better. I’d spend hours on the internet when he’d gone to bed, looking for new things to buy him. Toys he might like, clothes, blankets, new bottles, dummies. You name it, I was probably buying it. Every trip out ended with me coming home with new things for him.
He was probably about 4 by the time I noticed I was spoiling him and it was having a negative effect. He had every single toy he could dream of, birthdays and Christmas were like a Toys R Us commercial. I’d go above and beyond to make sure my precious child had everything he could ever dream of. But it didn’t do him any good. He didn’t really play with anything. It’s like he was so overwhelmed with all the choice and variety of fancy toys that he would rather play with nothing. Not only was he bored most the time, he didn’t have any respect for his stuff and God forbid any one tried to play with him and his toys. This really isn’t the way I wanted any of my children to be.
Now, I wasn’t a spoiled child. I was treated what I would call fairly “normal”. Birthdays were about £20-£40 worth of gifts from my parents and Christmas was about £100, so I don’t know where I got the idea from that it was good thing my child had everything he wanted as soon as he wanted it. He had no excitement for anything. You know when you were little, you’d really look forward to Christmas, birthdays etc, knowing you were going to get something really cool? My little one didn’t have any of it. It was more a case of “Oh, new stuff. OK.” It was quite heart breaking, in a way, that I’d caused this.
When I decided both he and I needed an attitude adjustment, we had a big sort out and made up quite a few boxes of toys to give away. After that, I decided toys from me, as his mother, were only going to be on special occasions. I’m not going to say I went from having a quite obviously spoiled child to a dream child over night, it took hard work on both our sides, but I feel I completely did the right thing. I didn’t limit toys to only Christmas and birthdays though, say if he’s done really well in school or he’s helping around the house and playing nice with his little sisters, I might just surprise him with a trip to Toys R Us. You know, make him feel like he’s really earned it rather than he deserves it just because.
Spoiling your children can have life long effects, I know it feels like we, as parents, are doing a great thing for them by giving them everything, but we’re actually doing them a disservice. It’s great to treat them now and then, but it doesn’t hurt them to go without sometimes, it doesn’t hurt them to not get everything they want whenever they want it. It builds character, helps them be responsible, respectful to their property, independent and imaginative. After all, it’s up to us to raise our kids to be the best version of themselves they can possibly be. Not the worst!